My spouse was unaware that a camera was present in the room. When he was with our daughter after the weekend, she had changed completely. However, what I saw on the tape completely upended my universe.
The last few months had seen a significant shift in him. Coldness, irritation, and persistent tardiness in returning home were all remnants of the devoted father and devoted husband.
The fact that he appeared to avoid our two-year-old daughter was what most concerned me. He would walk by her during the day as though she didn’t exist. He persuaded me not to call for assistance, though, and insisted on remaining with her on the weekends.
Following those “weekends,” the little girl had completely changed. She cried, refused to eat or play, and became terrified when she saw her father. I made an effort to persuade myself that it was only an age-related crisis. But I had a gut feeling that something else was out there.
I made the decision one day to conceal a camera in her room. I initially let out a breath of relief as I watched the footage that night because my spouse was on his phone and my daughter was playing. However, a few minutes later, something occurred that chilled me to the bone.
The following night I plucked up the bravery. I played the recording while seated across from him. His lips quivered and his eyes froze, but he attempted to dismiss it by saying, “I was just disciplining her.” The screams on the video were not as painful as those words.
I made sure he knew the truth. I demonstrated to him how he pulled our daughter away as she grabbed for his arms.
She had curled up in a corner, holding on to her toy like a life preserver, and I reminded him of that. One by one, his justifications crumbled.
He started to pace the room like a caged animal that was trapped, just like in the recording. However, he bowed his head as I said, “There was fear of you in her eyes.”
His voice broke: exhaustion, stress, work… Is that an excuse, though?
I stated unequivocally: he either gets assistance and changes, or he loses us both. No concessions.
I clutched my daughter’s hand at night. Unaware that her reality had started to shift, she slept.
And I was aware that tomorrow we would awaken to a different reality, and I would have to decide whether to preserve the marriage or provide unconditional protection for the child.
